got dumped again =(

sabrina has reached wichita. and she likes it there. =) oh well im going to bloody miss her alot, and so did melvin reach nigeria.

today at work, me and camellia had fun. hanging out with jake, kevin and michelle. funny part of it is there was this korea guy that it looks like camellia fancy him. so jake and his british accent was like you fancy him. and out of sudden, this korean ask jake for a present card to play with, so jake give the card to camellia and she wanted to pass it to him and he just wave it off. and i know it was kinda bad , but yeah bunch of us just started laughing and camellia ran in malu malu. =D then we keep teasing her.

oh well i guess working at the arcade has it perks. hehe. as much i was really upset when i woke up, i truely have awesome customers. like for real. i don't like whites, as racist as i am, but jake is different. well he is 13 for a start and him talking to me and always calling Apple Apple and somehow he is the only white guy i can stand. Its kinda weird actually. I guess thats because he is really friendly and he even thinks im cool. oh well. i guess without jake, michelle and kevin , i would hv really been in a stinky mood. Let's not forget Camellia and the craziness we have tgtr.


oh well , i know i know im hiding my sadness thru all this laughter. i mean what else can i do. he doesn't want to be together. other than that everything is my fault right. and ive tried really hard to make things out with him. if only my passport would come. but like he said , why would he want me to be back aniways with everything that happened. He is disgusted by me. That really upset me because if i know this would ever happened, i would have meet maryam longer, but i prioratise him. Yeah like seriously so what about melvin, its not like melvin would be asking me to be with him or whatever shit. I guess i just miss melvin that is why i talk about him to this so called bf of mine. i didnt meant in such a way that i want to be with melvin forever or what. and so what that i cried. a whole bunch of my friends and my bestfriend went off on the same night. even if i tell him, he wouldn't believe it. At times i wish i do listen to sabby about how i should just move on because if this guy don't believe me, don't even want to come to singapore to see what i do all the time. There is no way he would think im not doing anything. Now that Sabby is back in states, am really lonely u know and i feel like bursting to tears. I guess we really spend so much time together till morning all the time. As for melvin, when my bf breaks up with me, he is the one who keeps reassuring me that this k.l guy would come back and i should get a grip on my life. Its like he pushed me to have faith on my relationship when im like nah its over he don't love me. I can't do anything else except smile. I'm still growing up and even if i cry a thousand times, he wouldn't come back or even come to Singapore to get me to be his. Painful isn't it. Yeah it is. So I'll just live on. Cheers.


convo with camellia jang:

apple :i still want to wait for him.
camellia : seriously? you can wait for him under the coconut tree. waiting for his presence.
apple : ??? lol.

-credits from camellia jang.

thankGod for a new day, a new beginning. and yeah i know he block me off skype too.
block me off in every aspect of life. there's nothing else i can do but just keep going on, by my own.


apple foolishfruit.